Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Recently I got news of a couple of tragedies coming out of my hometown in Shelby, MT. A couple of long time residents both died tragically or as the result of a tragedy. One I knew of, but the other I knew very well. The first one, a sister from my home LDS branch, was coming home from work on I-15, going past one of the alkali flats that are so prevalent in that part of Montana. The alkali was extremely dry, and a strong wind caused all the alkali to blow, causing a white out. From what I understand, visibility was pretty terrible. She stopped because she couldn't see to drive. A semi rear ended her, and she died on the scene. She was the same age as my mother, just a couple of months younger. The other, a gentleman that, while I didn't know him well, I did know OF him. I went to school with a couple of his kids. I don't know the specifics of his accident, but I do know that a result of his accident, his injuries were pretty severe, and his body just couldn't heal from the trauma. He was on a motorcycle. Needless to say, these tragic accidents bring back to mind my own dad's accident. How I miss him. I can't believe that he has been gone six years this summer. SIX YEARS. There are some days that I am really okay....and then something happens, like these good people passing away, and it all comes back, and I grieving once again. I guess I never really STOP grieving completely, but there are definitely times that I do better. Days, weeks, sometimes even months will go by and I don't really think about the fact that my dad isn't HERE, but I think about the good times we had, how happy he is now. I miss him everyday, but there are days that are good. Weeks, that are good. Months, that are good. I think about him everyday. I see something that reminds me of him, or swear I smell his smell or hear his voice. Grief never completely leaves you. It is a daily visitor, a constant companion. Grief steals in when you aren't expecting it to and can leave you shuddering, crying, gasping for air. Grief can have tears running down your face at the slightest, imperceptible to everyone but you moment, like when you hear something, or smell something, or see something from the corner of your eye. You turn, and the person that you could have sworn was just there, really isn't. And you are hit with their loss all over again. I know how very much these people, a mother and a father, will be missed. I am so very grateful that I KNOW that this life is not the end, that I will see my dad, and other loved ones, again. I am so grateful for eternal families, that I can be with mine forever. I am so grateful, eternally grateful, for the Plan of Salvation. I know that when it is my time to pass through the veil to the other side, that my loved ones will be there waiting for me with open arms.